Revenue and your character: The fruitlessness of frustration
Someone who is frustrated - and whose frustration could be eliminated by an appropriate product or service - represents a revenue opportunity. That kind of frustration is a positive thing. The bigger the frustration, the bigger the opportunity.
However, on the other hand, if you're running a business, you can't afford to have any frustration inside your company walls. Companies with a lot of internal frustration do not do as well as the companies with little or none. That's just a fact.
If a company's frustration factor is low, everyone is happy - including customers, partners, employees, and managers. Customers return to the business again and again to make purchases. Partners make a point of signing up. Employees work harder and are more loyal. And everyone gets more done - including managers.
Where the frustration factor is high, everyone is bummed. No need to go into any more detail; anyone reading this column has personal experience buying from frustrating companies, trying to work with frustrating companies, and working in a frustrating environment.
Today I'm going to address frustration in an "up close and personal" way, because the way you handle frustration has a direct effect on your ability to earn revenue.
The first thing I need to say about frustration is that it is contagious. Frustration is so contagious that it can lead to a rapid-fire public riot - either a bunch of frustrated people get together, or a bunch of people who are gathered in one place all get frustrated. This is the frustration dynamic at its most extreme. We see it in a more muted, but just as destructive form, inside businesses.
As the business owner or manager, you are responsible for the "character" of your company, whether your company consists of you alone, or you and an army of employees. Character starts at the top. Your ability to handle frustration gracefully is one of the most important characteristics you can possess.
Here are the ways you can frustrate frustration.
1) Be the "buck stops here" person when frustration comes knocking. Since frustration is so contagious, it's easy to catch and easy to pass on. It takes real self-awareness to realize that you've just been infected, and, even more strength of character to decide that you're not going to spread the frustration.
2) Decide what to do. People get frustrated when they feel powerless against something that makes them unhappy or keeps them from doing what they want to do. The greater the perception of powerlessness, the greater the frustration.
Frustration itself requires energy. It sets in motion a very unhealthy stream of negative thought, as in: "I can't believe this is happening to me! I just wanted to print this #$%^ document and go to the appointment! Why do these things always happen to me when I'm in a deadline situation like this?" Or, "Oh, great, just what I need, a traffic jam!" Or, "All flights cancelled? You're kidding, right? I can't believe this!"
These thoughts won't get you anywhere. They will only make you more frustrated.
Instead, realize that frustration has come to call, again. Decide that you are going to ignore how you feel, and focus on what you are going to do. Yes, the printer is broken. You don't have time to fix it now. What can you do instead? Ah, yes. Copy the document to a USB drive and take it to the appointment. Or, take your laptop and print it when you get there. Or email it to an online site and pick it up when you get there. Or, email it to the client and ask the client to print it out - because your printer is broken. Once you take your attention away from the frustration and focus on the solution, all sorts of options open up.
3) Take a break. If the situation allows you to, just walk away from the source of the frustration. Go do something else for a while, and let your brain work on the problem in the background. Usually, while you are doing the other thing, the solution will come to you. My husband, who works on complex inventions and designs all the time, has long espoused this method. It does work. Don't just keep beating your head against the wall because you can't stand the thought of giving up. Just tell your brain that you aren't giving up, you're just going to take a little breather.
4) Ask for help. Take whatever it is as far as you can, then stop. Face the fact that you are now stuck, and think about who might be able to help you get to the next step. Organize the problem in your mind so you can describe it efficiently to the person you will be turning to, so you don't spread the frustration. Be open to the options they may suggest, for the same reason.
5) Don't talk about your frustration. Talking about it, which means someone else has to listen to it, only spreads the frustration. It gives power to the frustration. Encourage your employees to talk about solutions, not problems. Sure, they may need to describe the problem, but only with the goal of finding a solution. Talking about a problem just to vent frustration is a sure way to spread frustration and to increase the frustration factor in your life and your organization. Yes, psychiatrists have encouraged people to vent for years; frankly, I have never seen it do anything but make the patient more frustrated and morose. While the psychiatrist prospers.
6) Laugh it off - and turn it into lemonade. OK, so you've hit traffic. If there is absolutely no way around it - no alternative route and no way to just "walk away," just laugh at your predicament, and look for a way to turn your lemons into lemonade. Instead of sitting there fuming because you're stuck in a monster traffic jam, consider this a great opportunity to call someone you haven't talked to in ages. Or solve some other problem that you haven't had time to think about.
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When you think about the people who are perpetual victims, versus those who are successful, one of the big differences is the way they handle frustration. Perpetual victimhood is, by its very nature, a life filled with one frustration after another. I interview the candidates when I help clients build teams and departments. When I do, this is one of the things I look for. Does the person blame her troubles on others? Or, does she take them in stride, and has she turned those problems into new opportunities?
People who are frustrated all the time, when they interview for jobs, can't understand why they aren't getting a job that they feel they are perfectly qualified for. What they don't realize is that their long, sad story about their last boss put them on the "no" list during the interview. As they "sell" themselves to the potential employer, they "unsell" the very person they're determined to convince.
A lot of employees don't realize that the reason they're not managers is because of the way they handle frustration. The perpetual low-level employee will get frustrated, and then tell everyone how frustrated he is. The person who is on his way up will get frustrated, realize what's happening, deal with it, and solve the problem some other way. He will put his energy into solving the problem rather than discussing it with others. This person is given more and more responsibility; this person is promoted. The perpetually frustrated person is not.
If you know someone who is perpetually frustrated, wondering why they are "passed by" instead of promoted, you might want to pass along this article. Anyone who shifts from perpetually frustrated to someone who manages her frustrations will find that life will be much less frustrating.
With things moving as fast as they are now, with competitive pressures stronger than ever, you can't afford to be frustrated. You can't afford to have a company where the frustration factor is high. Look around. Is there someone who frustrates everyone else? Is there a system or process that frustrates everyone, but you just haven't considered it a priority?
Frustration will suck the revenues right out of your company. Recognize the sources of frustration, then change or remove them.
